It’s a New Year and it’s time to make a difference

Its_a_New_YearOne more year has passed away and we are entering into the all new fresh New Year-2019.

How inspiring was your 2018? Were you able to realize the dreams which you saw at the beginning on 2018?

If not, where did you miss? What were your New Year Resolutions last year? Did you stick to your plan?

Each year, by the end of the year we all set the NEW YEAR RESOLUTIONS and as the new year starts, we start taking huge steps towards the set outcome with full energy and enthusiasm………and in some days we loose it and ultimately give up.

Do we remember the resolutions we had last year? We don’t.

So today, when we are moving towards the very new fresh year – 2019, let us introspect that why do we give up?

In my opinion, we give up as we fear failure or we are stuck in past or we make chain of decisions and see ourselves failing or we don’t want to leave our comfort zone or we are satisfied with what we are or we don’t want to let go what we have or we strongly believe on our weaknesses or we want quick results and together we can list down 100s of more reasons to give it up.

So how to tackle all these?

It’s very simple compared to the complex way to give it up.

The very first thing which comes to my mind is that we need to identify the WHY. WHY I need to have some resolutions? Because I am not satisfied with what I am today, I want to change something so that I become better today than what I was yesterday. Am I Right?

Now it all depends on each individual on what he/she wants to change and become better on. There are different requirements for each one out there.

This is Wheel of Life which must be used to consciously arrive at a decision about which area one needs to focus. “1” being the lowest score and “10” the best. You can add/remove sections according to your needs before scoring.

During this activity, one has to rate each area of his/her life. And by doing that, you will come to something like below which is your present score in each area of your life.

Once you know the scores, you need to target for better scores at the end of 2019 and it may look like below

Now for these targets/goals to be compelling enough for you to achieve, you need to have a larger than life purpose associated with each of them or a collective purpose which you would be able to attain once you achieve your targets. This purpose must induce a burning desire within for you to jump out of your bed each morning and relentlessly act to achieve these.

You must have small milestones for self for each week and get feedback on what went good and what needs to be taken care of. What did you achieve in this last week and where do you need more efforts and actions.

Now we need to list the areas in sequence of priority in our life and pick a couple of them at a time to have a positive shift in prescribed time. A persistent effort on daily basis will make the actions a unconscious behavior and that will go in auto-pilot mode and once you are there in this mode, it is the time for you to pick the other two areas of your life in the list.

During this journey, one needs to be prepared for the last minute surprises and hurdles and small set-backs as these are the times when one normally gives up. But what I understand is that once you face these challenges, you need to be excited as these challenges shows that you are on the right path and these are just because you are leaving your comfort zone. EVERY SUCCESS IS OUTSIDE YOUR COMFORT ZONE.

Whatever is our present status in terms of the areas of our lives, is just because of our present behaviors. If we are able to identify the ideal behavior which leads to a better life, we can shift our behaviors and gain whatever we want to.

Everything revolves around Pain and Pleasure. As humans, we try and avoid pain and want to have pleasure. Every action has a Pain and Pleasure involved.

So one more simple exercise which helps you to have a massive positive change

1.    Identify what is your behavior which you want to change.

a.      For example if you want to go to Yoga session regularly to improve your health parameter but your behavior at present is to procrastinate the schedule or you are inconsistent.

2.      Identify what part of pleasure/pain principle this behavior is serving.  Are you getting a pleasure or are you trying to avoid a pain or both.

a.      You might identify that you are getting pleasure being in bed in early morning and at the same time trying to avoid the physical pain of going to Yoga classes.

3.      Identify what is your ideal behavior you would like to cultivate.

a.      It may be like getting out of bed and doing some Yoga Asanas or breathing exercises etc.

4.      Associate pain with the current behavior. Identify all that could go wrong or you will be missing in long term if you continue your behavior.

a.      Associate pain with present behavior.  Identify all the problems that you would eventually land into if you continue doing this behavior. The old age issues which will start surfacing when you are only 40 rather than at 75.

5.      Associate long term pleasure with the ideal behavior

a.      Use visualization method and travel in future and see yourself at age of 75 years feeling healthy, listen to people around talking about your energy levels and enthusiasm towards life

b.      While you are doing all this, imagine all this in vivid details and big pictures. Get more engaged. Brain is powerful machine, it can create experience from nowhere. Imagine people looking at your fitness and wanting to get tips on how you gained that.  Listen to them admiring you. Feel the sensations in your body. Involve all your 5 senses in doing that.

6.      Associate pain with not following your ideal behavior. This is most important step. Don’t miss this. Avoidance of pain is stronger emotion than chasing pleasure.

a.      Associate Pain with not following with the behavior. If you don’t go to Yoga Class, you will look uglier as your age progresses, you will be always tired and unfocused, people would avoid you… you will be burden on others in your old age…. etc.

7.      Once again imagine step 5 to come back to pleasure state.

At each successful achievement of any milestone, make it and event, reward yourself and live that experience and blow it out or proportion in your mind.

And yes, you are smart enough to know that if you don’t achieve that milestone, you need to punish yourself as well.

I personally feel that following these simple steps, you will make, keep and succeed in your promises made to self.


Wish you a Very Happy & Successful 2019.

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